Saturday, January 24, 2015

post in italiano

Giusto per fare qualcosa di diverso, scrivo questo post in italiano. Tanto c'e' il traduttore a fianco per chi ne abbia bisogno! Sono 4 mesi che non abito piu' in Italia e sto inziando a sentirne la mancanza, sia delle cose belle che di quelle che mi davano fastidio.

Beh, le ultime di meno!! Ci ricordiamo sempre di piu' delle cose belle quando ci allontaniamo e ci dimentichiamo di quelle brutte.

Cio' che mi manca è: Il sole, gli amici, il calore e la disponibilita' della gente, il cibo (ovvio!), le belle ragazze (eh!) e la sensazione di stare in un posto che ha una lunga storia in ogni angolo, e dove ci sono le mie origini. Dopo 5 anni m'aggia scettat come si dice a Napoli e mi sono accorto che purtroppo la nostra amata Italia sta fallendo e che non promette un futuro stabile e dignitoso per la mia e le nuove generazioni.

Non so nel Nord, o da Roma in Su, ma cio' e' stata la mia impressione al Sud. Secondo me per salvarla ci vorrebbe una rivoluzione e rifare tutto da capo ; se non si scoccia nessuno naturalmente. Lo dicevo spesso e lo dico ora, se gli italiani mettessero la meta' della passione che hanno per il calcio nella voglia di cambiare il paese per il bene, l'Italia sarebbe un posto prospero che non creerebbe piu' la voglia di andarsene.

Per non dire sempre le stesse stronzate vorrei chiudere con i miei ricordi piu' belli, quelli che veramente fanno sentire la mancanza del Paese e che a volte mi fanno venire la voglia di tornare, di pensare alle possibilita' che ci possono essere per me in futuro.

1. Ho vissuto al Sud, il posto delle mie origini. Sarà per la gente che ci sono rimasto 5 anni, per il loro cuore e carattere divertente. Ho visto un po’ tutto sinceramente, i belli, i brutti e i cattivi, stronzi, buoni e strani, funerali, festa di laurea, colloquio di lavoro, litigi, amore, ecc ecc. La bellezza del Sud era una cosa che a me non sembrava vera, ossia quella di svegliarmi ogni mattina con la possibilita' di prendere il treno/il pullman e andare in posti che molti turisti vedono una volta sola nella vita. Per me, invece, erano abbastanza raggiungibili, a portata di mano.

2. Il cibo. azz,e che qualita'! Credo che questo parli da solo. Io qui in Inghilterra non riesco a ricreare tutti i piatti di pasta che mangiavo in Italia perche' qui gli ingredienti purtroppo non hanno lo stesso sapore. L’unico tipo di pasta che so fare bene è la pasta al sugo che mangio spesso, anche perche' costa poco e così non mi faccio il buco in petto a Tesco! (Dall’espressione napoletana “o buc mmpiet”, cioè quando ti fanno spendere troppo!)

3. Andare con la bicicletta sul lungomare d'estate. Salerno e' una citta' ideale per prendere un po’ di sole sia in spiaggia che in bici. Sicuramente il 99% degli italiani non penserebbe mai di prendere il sole andando in bicicletta. Personalmente non mi andava di sdraiarmi sulla sabbia che si appiccica dopo un bagno e arrostirmi con un pollo allo spiedo invecchiando la pelle.

4. Per me l’Italia e' sempre stato un posto in cui avrei voluto vivere. Non nascondo che a me l'America non piace. Infatti non riuscivo a capire l'amore per l'America che avevano gli italiani (poi col passare degli anni, ho capito meglio questo amore cieco per gli USA). Mi divertivo quando esprimevo il mio parere sul mio paese. In realtà mi piaceva cosi tanto stare così lontano dall'America che questo mi dava una tranquillita' che, purtroppo, andava via ogni volta che qualcuno mi faceva delle domande a riguardo.

Mah, chissa' dove mi trovero' a fine anno. Una cosa pero' e' certa, cioe' che il mio cuore e una parte del cervello rimarra' sempre italiana.

People

People for me by far are the greatest educators in life. People in the sense that you learn more about yourself through the interactions with others. The last 24 hours have been rather interesting, things you might see in a movie.

I will mention them one by one here:

1. A classmate of mine tried to introduce me to her business which seems to deal with a medical product that apparently can cure a lot of illnesses. The founder was in a wheelchair, and after 850 trial runs with certain foods, came up with the right combination which somehow regenerated his body. While I am sure this is a wonderful product and my classmate is seeing the benefits from it one year in (as an associate), I don't believe these things are for me. So I will kindly decline

2. I was at the bi-monthly Uni party here at Aston. It's called Pounded. A euphemism for buying a beer for only a pound, hence you are "pounded". I felt a little out of place as I am not much for the club scene, although I go to see people that I know. I am not particularly good at hitting on girls at a club as I find the whole atmosphere somewhat artificial. I prefer a real conversation where I can hear the other person clearly and get a better taste of their personality. For this I prefer salsa nights as it has a more mature feel to it and it's a night more dedicated to the art of dancing than doing a marathon of shots and acting like a moron in front of your friends. At one point there were these Indian guys (perhaps Middle Eastern) and loud voices and shoving eventually led to one dude taking a swing at another. Eventually one of these was thrown out.

For me it's pure comedy. I like seeing these kinds of things as it amazes me how stupid people can be. In this case you are either immature, egotistical and you let some other jackass get the best of your nerves, or a combination of both. I have never been in a fight in my life and I can't imagine being thrown out of a place.

3. Some girl on Skype with the genius attempt at hiding her intentions with the screenname "yum", decided to add me on Skype and start a sex conversation. This is assuming she wasn't a 300lb gay dude with a hairy back! She asked me what got me off, tits or ass? I said "I like helping people". Then I blocked her and that was the end of it.

4. I had to complain to my flatmates about something and I could tell they didnt want to hear it. I can tell when someone doenst look you in the eye when you talk to them. But we settled the matter anyway.

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

I'm still alive!

I haven’t updated my blog since late 2012! A lot has happened and I will attempt to briefly tell what happened in all this time. Why do I continue my blog? Everyone has their view as to why we write these things. Mine is simple: a way to reach out to others to share experiences, hopes, opinions and dreams. Perhaps someone reads this and finds that he/she is not alone in the world. After all, we aren’t mean to be forever alone.

This might seem strange coming from a person who has lived in a few studio apts, but I always had an active social life and I hate staying at home for days on end. I’d say that I lived alone many times out of frustration for living with people who had no regard for the fact that there were others in the house and who didn’t have a civic duty to respect the space of others. There is nothing worse than living in a dirty place where you’re the only one who does most of the cleaning, and when you have people who don’t allow you to sleep at night in the name of their own entertainment (late night suppers with friends, music, etc. etc.) Selfish people in other words. You’re home should be your base where you can unwind and temporarily detach from the world.

The biggest news is that I am in England, at Aston University in Birmingham pursing a degree, an MA in TESOL. About 95% of the population has never heard this acronym which stands for “teaching English to speakers of other languages.” What that means is I am teaching English to people who can’t speak English that well if at all. Some people have asked me “But don’t they already speak English there?” Yes of course. The English people are also an ethnically pure race like the North Koreans and have never heard of immigration.

Anyway, I decided to come here after 5 years in Southern Italy from which really I had no set plans to leave there. My goal was just to work as an English teacher and enjoy la Dolce Vita. But sadly reality sank in, and I realized Italy is a country in financial trouble with no real plan to ensure a future for people my age and younger. I was fed up with not being able to travel, own a car, buy cool things once in a while and just got sick of being short on cash. Eventually I realized that if I wanted to be successful as an English teacher (or teacher in general), then I would need to further my education which hopefully will then allow me to apply to more prestigious places. People ask me, why England? Indeed, this is a country with defects, but what country doesn’t have them? The weather here is in fact not the greatest. But, I deal with and it look at the positive sides. However the fact is this: coming here I saved half the time and half the money doing a Master as opposed to doing it in America. Also being an Italian citizen, I was able to qualify for lower tuition (and having lived there, in Italy in recent years was necessary for lowering my costs) and I avoided a costly visa to come here. Lastly, they have the NHS, so tax funded health care.

After I finish here in Sept of this year I have to decide where I want to eventually settle down. I will be 35 in 3 weeks and I am starting to feel the need to bring things to a center and secure something for the bigger picture. I am thinking of staying here in the UK as I see this as a stable country with a public health plan (NHS) and possibility for a career. I may however decide to go back to the USA even though I am not wild about the idea. Popular culture in many countries (especially Italy Dio Santo!) look at the USA as a magical place and the idea that one who is from there who does not want to go back (me in other words) is crazy. I can understand this concept as the movies and the overall influence of the USA is tantalizing.

However I can speak from 1st hand experience having lived in 3 different countries, that what you hear and what you actually experience can be quite different. My advice to anyone who wants to relocate to the USA is to be very prepared. Prepared in the sense that it pays to be educated or know a craft (in fact the latter can be quite profitable if you’re good at sometime and you’re willing to work). The bottom line is you need money to live comfortably in America. Geographically it does have the advantage of being large, so if life doesn’t suit you in NY, you can relocate to Chicago and thanks to modern times, it’s possible to re-invent yourself later in life. So, yes I criticize the USA but not on everything obviously. It simply depends on who are you, what you do there and how you perceive American life. I suppose what irritates me, is how people consider it the only place on Earth where you can have a good life. May I suggest Canada, Northern Europe or Australia?

So I will consider the USA later this year, but I have my reservations and I don’t know if I fit in anymore with American society having spent these 5+ years abroad. One thing is for sure; I do not want to live in Connecticut again and all its glorious taxes and bitter cold winters. For the USA we’ll see.

Being a student again has been hard. I am not a patient reader (I get bored easily to the point of near dyslexia) nor do I have good time management skills at times. There are lot of readings that I have to do which are not always interesting and at times I feel I am dealing with academic writers who feel the need to show off their ability to make a simple concept complicated. Perhaps I am new to this aspect of reading and writing, but I know when something is not simple. I just took an exam this past Sat, the first in nearly 5 years as well as 3 assessments that I had to hand in. At first I thought I did terrible, but not I might be too hard on myself. I wont think about it anymore and just accept come what may.

Women. Let’s not go there! But I mentioned it so fair enough :D The older I get the more I know what I want. I asked a friend of mine yesterday what type of girl I should be with. She was very accurate in her description: romantic, serious and dynamic. A sense of humor would be appreciated too and God willing I find her beautifully both physically and mentally. I believe an attraction touches upon multiple senses and both are essential in a relationship. Women I think are blessed with the ability to look more with their hearts and to exclude physical imperfections.

One thing I have realized is that I can’t be with anyone who is mean, vindictive, empathy lacking and selfish. Also, I think I would be better off with a woman of faith, better if it’s mine, Catholic. I’ll be 35 soon and so I hope something happens in the next couple of years as I would like to have a family eventually. But to quote an Italian expression “Meglio solo che mal accompagnato”, it’s better to be alone than in in bad company. Amen.

To close, I would just like to add that the beauty of getting older is that you acquire more knowledge both of yourself and the world. Therefore I think this can allow you to be at peace with yourself and to realize what were superficial expectations in the past vs. what really counts in life. Also, to not give a damn what others think of you, to not concede to what they perceive of reality and of you is something valuable. Our brains are like filters which must be cleaned once in a while. That cleansing comes in the form (for me at least) of a faith in God, meeting other people and immersing yourself in the world around you. You must also realize that not everyone is going to like you and that’s fine. We are going to make mistakes and maybe not make others happy. That’s life. But as long as we realize those mistakes, learn from them and to forgive others then we can be at peace with ourselves.